This is Not Her
by K-promises-fall
Summary: A oneshot about Hinata and how her life turned out. Dark, angsty, tragic in a way. Does contain sucide, cheating, deception and dark hatred. You have been warned. Rated M as a precaution.


**This is Not Her**

**By: K-promises-fall**

K: Wanted to write some piece of crap. Serious writer's block on almost all of my stories! Can you believe it? 12 stories and yet I have NOTHING to write in them. Life is cruel…

**Warning: Suicidal and VERY angsty. IF YOU DON'T LIKE THAT COMBINATION DO NOT READ THIS STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. I keep forgetting that I have to say that for some reason.

**Revised Dec/7/2009**: Just made it easier to read and fixed up a few awkward sentences. Nothing much. No one likes long paragraphs.

O O O

Hinata stood looking at the breathtaking view before her, her Byakugan blazing.

The Village hidden in the Leaf was beautiful at night. Especially on a night as peaceful as this. A soft wind blew and everything seemed to be in a serene oath of quiet.

But was this truly Hinata? Hinata was kind, warm, shy and stuttering, submissive, pitiful, innocent, fragile, weak…_ vulnerable_. She was ignored and stepped on. Unconfident. Hinata was a hopeless romantic with a love- no… a _want_, for happy endings, and a soft spot for tragic deaths and lonely lives; cold and alone just like she was. She gave small, gentle, shy smiles and never looked down on anyone, because she believed them all to be above her. Is this Hinata?

No, it is not. It looks like Hinata, has the same scent as Hinata and even sounds like Hinata, but she is not. Her eyes are cold, filled with anger and hatred. She stands rigid, head held high. Her fists are clenched; her blood drips unto the ground from where her nails draw blood. This person looks ready to kill. She is not even wearing Hinata's usual attire, instead dressed in a black hoodie with the hood up and dark jeans. No, this is not Hinata. It cannot be. Is it?

This silhouette atop the Hokage monument glaring out at the silent, peaceful and mostly asleep Konoha; her Byakugan alive, veins pulsing with a rage that had steadily built up over the years; this was Hinata. This is what she had become. No more was she an innocent angel, and gone was the girl with fantasies of getting stronger and making her family proud, and obliterated, the lovesick child who watched her crush for endless hours in the shadows waiting for him to notice her.

She counted each ANBU that crossed her sight, each Chuunin stationed at each watch points in the village. She needed to make sure they wouldn't interfere. She needed to make sure they were too far away to interfere. It was so easy for her. She could literally see everything going on in the village and it only fueled her rage.

Why was it that this village, that shunned and broke her because of her one, small flaw, could sleep peacefully at night and dream while she had nightmares? Why is it that the people who betrayed her were able to live their lives happily and freely with no worries while she was forced to wear this cruel mask? A mask they gave to her; a mask so innocent on the outside, but covered with spikes within. Spikes that hurt and pained her with every twitch and smile she sent them. They said it would make her stronger, bolder, _better_, when all it did was to inflict pain. So much pain that she had grown used to it. Pain that, the moment it was stopped, that moment when she took off her mask, would cause her world to crumble.

Well guess what? Tonight she had taken it off, and indeed her world was crumbling and falling down on top of her. But all that time in pain had made her hate grow strong- from non-existent to the only thing that fueled her at this very moment, and she actually had an inkling as to how the Uchiha bastard must have felt for most of his pathetic life. Betrayed by those he had held close.

Faint music could be heard, interrupting the still night, and Hinata knew where it was coming from without even looking. The source of the music was the same place where most of the bright lights shone and chased most of the dark away. It was her home, the Hyuuga Manor, where her father was holding Neji's bachelor party.

His bachelor party. The thought ignited a painful burning sensation within her. She could feel it feeding off her rage and growing- slowly taking up every fiber of her being, causing her to become so tense that she was shaking with her unbridled rage. They were celebrating- celebrating her forced engagement to him.

There really was no justice in the world.

She had gotten stronger- she knew it, _they knew it_! But they refused to accept her like she had wanted. Denied her the one thing she had asked of them- to be proud of her. They always found something wrong with her. They completely ignored her progressions and focused on where she lacked her new and improved skill. They didn't want her as their leader just because they refused to believe that she was able to lead them. The moment she was born they had condemned her to die and written her off as weak and worthless to the clan.

They would kill her, she knew. She could see it reflecting in their eyes; the joy of seeing her dead.

They would marry her off to Neji, making him their "powerful" clan head and in due time she would be forced into reproducing with him, and they poison her, claiming she had died in childbirth, and Neji would marry Hanabi. Of course they wouldn't want their _"noble"_ name soiled with public rumors of being responsible for her death. This way no one would question; no one would care. She hated it all. She knew what they were all doing, her supposed "friends" who had felt "sympathy" for her. _**Bullshit**_. Hinata sneered, darkness- a raging black furnace, behind her milky white eyes.

Naruto, the man she had once given everything for, he who had once told her that he loved her, was in his office at the Hokage Tower. Yep, the _fool_ had actually become Hokage, but she doubted it was because of skill and experience.

'_More like an old lady on her dying bed who loved him like a little brother and just __**happened **__to be Hokage at the time. Heh. So stupid…'_

But what pissed her off was that he told her he would be working on a way to nullify her engagement to Neji. A strained, dark chuckle left Hinata's throat. He was working all right. And he was so focused on his "work" that she was sure any thoughts of their relationship before the engagement never crossed his mind. So busy with his work that everyone knew to not interrupt him. And so _dedicated_ to it that the moans, screams, gasps, and pleas coming from the mouth of Haruno Sakura were the only things he noticed and cared to notice as he fucked the daylights out of her. She could see them and it disgusted her; so much so that if she wasn't focused on her anger she would puke. More blood dripped onto the rock beneath her from her hands and it ran down her chin as she bit down hard on her lower lip to keep from screaming out loud and drawing attention from the ANBU.

She focused somewhere else, anywhere and she saw them all, those who had said they cared. Kiba who had claimed that he would make Neji and Hiashi pay, having his way with girls half his age. She had seen him earlier on today. Talking with Neji at the ramen stand and actually laughing at something Neji said while her fiancé smirked. Pathetic. Shino, her caring and considerate older brother, simply told her that there was nothing she could do but accept it. Kurenai, Ten-ten, Ino, Chouji.

Shikamaru himself was at the very bachelor party right now.

None of them knew what this was doing to her! After everything she did for them, every time she went out of her way to comfort them and return them to their happy cheerful moods even if it killed her to know she could never be that happy. She could see them. Memories of a time when she was ignorant and blind to their lies. What's worse, she knew. She _knew_ they didn't care and that it was all just a front to cheer her up and make her feel accepted, but she was so desperate. She wondered if they would even care when she was gone. They knew how much she didn't want this. But then again, why the surprise? They never helped her out before outside of missions when she screwed up and got in the way.

Hinata sighed, becoming more relaxed as she let go of all her frustration in that one breath. Now that she was calm she could feel the sting coming from her palms and lip, but it was minor and she ignored it as she looked up at the sky and out at the horizon.

The sun was about to rise. She could already see the light chasing the dark away. It was time. She knew what was coming. Sound ninjas were advancing on their borders and only she knew. How she knew, no one would ever know. She just did. She could warn them. Oh, she could! The looks on Naruto and Sakura's faces as she calmly walked in on their little cheating session and told them of Konoha's fall to Oto. Oh! She could warn them.

But no. She wouldn't. A small smirk appeared on her face as she thought that. It was payback for abandoning her. For everything they did for her in their "_thoughtfulness_". Hinata ignored the soft sound of feet landing a few feet behind her. They were too late. She had already leaned forward and felt as her feet no longer stayed in contact with the Hokage monument. She closed her eyes and allowed herself to enjoy her moment of freefalling- of freedom. And smiled as she felt the wind in her face.

No, this person is not Hyuuga Hinata. And these splattered, bloody remains of her body on the platform before the monument could never belong to her. It couldn't be, because the world knew her as the kind, generous, shy, innocent angel. But the person who had died here was troubled, insane and overflowing with hate and rage. Today, this nameless person had committed suicide, yesterday, Hyuuga Hinata had been murdered.

O O O

K: I'm quite proud of it. My first true suicide fan fic. Drop by a review, but if you're just going to tell me some crap about how this would never happen and how badly I screwed up Hinata and blah blah blah. Don't bother. I warned you so I don't see why the hell you read this story. So just screw yourself over and drop dead. Other than that, yeah don't hesitate to tell how you think.

Later ^^


End file.
